#1300

Hare:  Butthole Whisperer

Hounds:  Boathouse Pussy, Tongues A Cunt Occasionally, Power Bottom Redding, Butt Tickling Ken, nnJohn, Sinnabar, Neaux Bleaux Ange, Caught In Action, Cumbag Shitpants, nnCollin, Tina Eat the Piss, Piss Car Poor

How does that little ditty go.......?  S-H-I-T-T-Y, T-R-A-I-L........Yeah, that's it.  It's funny how this song was written long before this trail was perpetrated on our pack, because it describes the trail to a T.  Starting from AJ's (good pizza, btw), the hare took us on a lovely rectangular path to the west, through a very boring neighborhood, then 90 degree-ed us to the south, through this same endless, coma-inducing subdivision until he led us to the beer near.  This is where events took an interesting turn, thanks to nnJohn.  As the pack was gathering for the sacred nectar, nnJohn decided it would be funny to chuck a beer to BTK, who was walking to the gathering.  Except nnJohn forgot to say "heads up", or "here ya go, BTK", or "think fast, asshole, there's a beer cumming toward your head at 90 mph".  No, BTK first was made aware of the gift of beer by experiencing a one-inch gash on his forehead, accompanied by blinding pain and gushing blood.  I guess that will teach him.  Something.  Not sure what, though.

Trail then took us through a hitherto unknown-to-the-hashing-community shiggy strip, which was easily bypassed by following alongside it on the concrete.  Trail led us across Rock Road, by the megachurch.  Once we found trail through the parking lot we discovered an intersection mark on 29th Street.  The group of not-so-bright wankers then located marks which took them east to Heartspring.  The hashers who were slightly more intelligent noticed that the on-in was a few hundred feet to the north, and so decided to look for trail in that direction.  They did not find marks but they did find the on-in and the hare and got to the beverages way before the racists.

So after the blood-letting debacle at the beer near, most of the pack spent their time pondering an appropriate name for nnJohn.  Some of the more popular suggestions were:  Sergeant Dildo Head, Sergeant Bitch Tits, Sergeant Cum Cake, Sergeant Mud Crab Dildo Bitch, and Sergeant Cock Gobbler.  But for now and forevermore in the hashing community, or until he does something even more stupid, nnJohn will be known as Sergeant Semen Sucker, or SSS (with accompanying hand flip).  On on!